Okay, Cupid: Nada so far…

Experience #2

This on-line dating thing is such a joke. I mean that literally. I laugh a lot at profiles, including my own. Because when you get right down to it, is it even possible to get to know someone through their writing? Let me give you an example… This was an unsolicited message I received a few days ago. I just copied and pasted the text–no edits done by me at all. ok cupid marvin

Hello.
How are you doing today? I hope you having a wonderful holiday weekend.
I saw your pic out there and you were looking so beautiful. And i decided to reach you out for a good friendship.
I would love to know you too well if you feel the same don’t let it slip away your grip tight.
I am Marvin age 38 I am single. I live alone by myself..I am a Military Engineer.

I love your age.. I believe i can do anything to make you feel happy. Not only that. I am a strong man i can satisfy you. in all way.. You know what i mean.. LOL!!!
I’m looking for my TRUE LOVE,someone who is exciting enough to get my Attention and keep it…Trust,Loyalty,Honest and Communication is a deal breaker for me,if I don’t feel that,I don’t think it’s Necessary to try and build a Relationship or friendship with me.
do you Id on the instant yahoo messenger I believe it would be more faster in communication.
I want a new life. I will so much appreciate it if you can grant me that. I need to be in good communication with you can we?
Am looking forward in hearing from you.

with Love
Marvin

I check out his profile, expecting to read that this guy was from a different country. Nope. He was wearing a military uniform (army?). He says he’s very religious (which I’m not). There’s a whole bunch in his profile that is just NOT what I’m looking for. However, there were a few (very few) similarities between us.

But before I hit the delete button, I think, What if he’s The-One? Can I really know what he’s like on paper? So I write back, even telling him I’m not sure we’d be a great match, but I’d still like to know him better. I ask some questions–how long has he been in the military? Why does he look so young in his pictures? If he’s originally from the Bay Area… Here’s his answer:

Its good to read from you. I can get along with you and the believe things wont be a problem to me as well.. reading profile is not really what you think that might birng a perfect connection or what.. Been in good communication we can learn more about each other. I have been in the Military for about 14yrs.. and Yes people do talk about my look. this is how it is in my family we look more younger than our age. and not i m not from the bay area.

Whaaattt? What can I possibly know about this man from his writing? Some possible things came to mind: English is not his first language. He has a severe writing disability. He’s a Kenyan Prince in disguise who’s going to make me a millionairess a few emails down the road. He sustained a brain injury. He was wasted when he answered the email.

He’s obviously not a Cyrano de Bergerac.

Cyrano de Bergerac, a man with a heart of love and a way with words.

Cyrano de Bergerac, a man with a heart of love and a way with words.

So, my stats on OK Cupid since joining on May 5th:
Initial messages I’ve sent: Ten
How many have answered: Three.

  • One of them said he was involved with someone, but it was an open relationship and would I like to have sex. I was tempted for a moment. A short moment.
  • A second one oozes unresolved pain around his recent divorce (and when I sent him a message it was just to say ‘hang-in there!’, so I wasn’t expecting this to go anywhere).
  • The third man seems okay. Nothing yet to write about.

Unsolicited messages I’ve received: Eight.

  • One man from India.
  • One from some Middle Eastern country.
  • Two from Texas
  • One from Los Angeles.
  • That leaves me with three men from the same area I live (supposedly). I’m following up, but I’m not that excited about any of them.
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